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Showing posts with the label Fake News

Babylon Versus Uruk, Peace or War? Debate of the -26th Century

We may be a bit late to release this article, as the focus of it happened over 4000 years ago, but our main journalists have discovered the secret to time travel and have traveled back in time to view these events, at the cost of 14 school buses full of outdated 17th century Webster English dictionaries and 12 Concorde jets filled with 2019 Cannon Inkjet printers. (This article is barely true, we took a few creative liberties) Babylon Moves Army to City of Uruk, How long will Peace Last? Recently, the city of Babylon sent their army to surround the major cities of Mesopotamia, including Uruk. No violence has broken out yet, but a siege may not be as unlikely as it seemed yesterday. The city of Uruk is prepared to fight for the empire they rightfully stole. King Gilgamesh, who was interviewed about 4 thousand years ago, said, "those Babylonians have been eyeing out portion of the Tigris [river] for years, waiting for a chance to steal our fields and crops. I fear the worst....

President Trump Scheduled to Arm-Wrestle Kim Jong Un at next Nuclear Summit

President Trump is scheduled to arm wrestle Kim Jong Un at their next meeting. "This event will decide the future of the North Korean nuclear weapons program," says one of our sources who decided to stay anonymous. The arm wrestle, scheduled to take place on the second day of the summit, will be a historic event. "This is the fight of the century," says Caleb Frank, one of our journalists here at TTN, with some connections to the white house, "The outcome of this [arm] wrestle will determine the winner of WW4. Most historians know that if parliament was ever having a hard time passing a law, then each side would send one representative to [arm] wrestle the other, but this has never happened at such a large scale." The White House Press Correspondent says "The president is looking forward the 28th [the day of the scheduled event] and he has been cooped up in the Oval Office for hours on end taking advice from the professionals and exercising his musc...